Category Archives: Thoughts

The bulk of my thoughts go here. Life, something you can’t avoid.

My First Hot Towel Shave Service for Sir

I’ve almost always shaved Sir’s face, especially since I asked for him to grow out his hair so that I could enjoy it. But it’s been perfunctory over the bathroom sink, nothing more. Two weeks ago, Sir mused that he’d … Continue reading

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Not Ready

I’m not submissive material yet. I have a long way to go, apparently. And even if I was his submissive today nothing would change. It’s a hard pill to swallow. So I guess, it’s this: he’s considered me and deemed … Continue reading

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Self-Care

This is a hard lesson for me right now.

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Hopes and Fantasies

KnyghtMare and I are still in the consideration phase. I’m told I need to be showing him what kind of submissive I can be for him, complying with what I know his expectations are and as my displays of non-combative … Continue reading

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Allowing Myself to Feel

I’m back with my self-work, trying to get my head and my life straightened around so that I’m happy and healthy and in fulfilling, nurturing relationships. Today, I’m working on my feelings. For years now, I’ve made it a habit … Continue reading

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The Loss of Monogamy: A Many Year Grieving Process

I’m still working on me and here I am with another poignant thought in my healing process. I’m reading a book about co-dependency and tonight’s chapter was about grieving. Often, what causes co-dependents to act they way they do and … Continue reading

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Need to Worship

So the last time I wrote about my personal journey I had rediscovered my submission completely by accident and had one of my best days in a long time, only to realize that since I had no one to submit … Continue reading

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Something “Clicked” Today

I’ve been doing a lot of self work when I’m home on the weekends and this weekend was no different. I’ve been focusing my efforts on a few things that I know I need to work on but also trying … Continue reading

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