March Question Month: The Poly Questions

How do you personally support your Master in the aftermath of his other relationships? Do you ever feel any sense of relief that the other relationship has ended, or is it mainly sadness for him that it didn’t work out?

I support him the same way I’d support any close friend or family going through a breakup. I do have a sense of relief that the other (recent) relationship ended, but not because I didn’t want them in the relationship, but because the relationship had turned toxic.

 

I read once that you expressed a desire to be ‘special’ being the primary partner, while your master disagreed and felt it wasn’t necessary for you to hold any higher position relationship-wise over the others, and that he saw you all as equals. I may have stated that wrong, apologies if I did. But on that note, do you personally feel that being designated as ‘special’, and holding a higher emotional priority for your master would make it easier for you to cope with poly?

Yes, I do feel that if I were designated special, higher ranking, whatever, that I’d cope with KM’s need to be poly a lot better than I do. But since that’s not the way he thinks of relationships, there’s no reason for me to dwell on it.

 

Finally, speaking as one Scorpio to another, do you feel that jealousy is a major problem for you when it comes to poly?

I’m not jealous of him all the time, but jealousy does come up. I think that’s normal and leads to some extra conversations and maybe some scheduled “just the two of us” time. My major problem is that I’m so far in a monogamous brain that I can’t understand a lot of what makes him tick as a poly person. He’s explained it to me so many times and I still can’t grasp the concepts well.

 

Thank you for the questions.

–lunaKM

2 comments

  1. sugarsack’s avatar

    I explain poly to people as having multiple children you dont really love one more than the others… for you maybe your pets … do you love one cat more than the other ? or do you love certain things about them / their personality traits… I have two sons and I do love them both but they both have different things about them that I love.. thats how I explain poly to people…

    hope that helps some

    ss

  2. lunaKM’s avatar

    Well, I do have a partial love of my eldest cat more than the other two because he once belonged to my best friend (whom I no longer see). And it’s not exactly that I don’t understand that you can love more than one person the same way or even different ways and have them fulfill you. It’s deeper dynamic things that I just can’t wrap my head around.

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