I never know when I’m going to write here anymore. Sometimes I get the desire to talk about something, but don’t, or if it’s to do with the poly relationship Master has with froggy I make sure that those involved know first. Because who wants to find out my feelings on something from my blog before talking about it? Um, no.
This week I’ve been in trouble and punishment has been hard. Not in the, OMG I’m going to never have freedoms again, but more along the Master keeps forgetting I’m in trouble and I’m having to remind him I’m not allowed to do what he’s suggesting.
The first part of punishment was removal of my TV privileges, which had a caveat for Captain America. Master said he wasn’t going to be punished just because I was, and that we’d be going to the movie. So we’ve actually been twice. He wants to rewatch Game of Thrones before the new season starts up, and so I said sure we could start Monday night and he actually asked me why we needed to wait. When I reminded him that’s when my punishment was lifted it seemed that again I was inconveniencing him.
The second part of my punishment is that I’m only allowed water. Or so I thought. His exact words were, “no flavored water” so I knew kool-aid was out and the sodastream water we make. Well in fact I can have coffee, tea, hot chocolate, cider and milk as long as they aren’t the majority of my drink choices. And yet, because he didn’t want me to buy water at the theater I’ve had pop there.
I get that I’m in trouble. I mishandled the finances which cost us some money and stress so I know why I’m in trouble. It’s been a long while since I’ve been in trouble badly enough to incur a “grounding” sort of punishment so it isn’t easy, but it’s worse so when I have to keep reminding Master that I’m being punished.
And yes I’m kinda whiny about it here. I guess I want him to be more strict about punishments if he’s going to hand them out, ya know?
We’ve been planning to move to be closer to froggy for some time now. She lives in a city that I’ve never had a desire to live in – but am making the concession to move because Master will be there. I tried hard to find something in a nearby town without much luck. Well, so we applied for an apartment in the same complex. Convenient for Master and froggy, right?
I talked with Master about further rules or limits I’d like in place when we do move; since she’ll be so close and I don’t want to change my position in the relationship. I’ve been waiting to talk about it here until he talked with froggy about it – so that’s the main reason I’ve not written here in a long time.
As I believe I’ve mentioned before I’ve been uncomfortable being in the same place as them when they are affectionate or playful and basically I don’t want to be exposed to the relationship. I want a closed triad since an open one was way too difficult for me. I’m just not cut out for that sort of poly. The new rules will help ensure that I still get my space.
- froggy will have to seek permission to come over. She can’t just drop by unannounced.
- She will not be allowed to stay overnight. Sleeping arrangements are so darned hard right now and there’s no reason for her not to walk across the parking lot and sleep in her own bed.
- The majority of play will happen at her house or when I’m not home. I really hate being asked to leave just so they can play.
I’m not sure how things will go once we move, but that’s a starting point. Master and I talked at length about my place in his life and where froggy fits in again. I have a feeling I’ll need that occasionally. Just to reassure myself that I’m not being replaced.