I guess I’m pretty apathetic lately. Master has been concerned with my disinterest with things and I can’t think of why. I mean I am spending a lot of time reading about gluten intolerance so that I can be more informed and what I’m reading is starting to sink in that I’m having to make a huge change.
It’s overwhelming.
My mood lifted a bit in the evening but I felt a huge sense of fatigue so I’m going to have to try to sleep in later tomorrow morning.
–lunaKM
Master and I were out all of the afternoon and evening. Thursday we bought a Verizon mobile hotspot plan and since we don’t have 4G here yet (this summer they are saying) we drove to our other frequent haunt and tested it out there. Master says the speeds are great so he’s quite happy with the little gadget.
For dinner we met some friends, Kiva and Sissy Rachelle for dinner at Famous Daves. They have a very tiny gluten-free menu but can’t guarantee cross contamination since nothing is dedicated. Well I stuck with that menu but this morning I’m suffering. Something I ate had too much gluten in it for my newly adjusting body to handle. I’m guessing it was the cole slaw – listed on the menu but often in other places it has emulsifiers in it that are wheat based. I mentioned that I was surprised it was listed – I should have stuck with my gut instinct and skipped it.
This morning I spent some time looking at restaurant sites that are nearby so that I can be more educated. One of the restaurants that we’ve been to, that Master isn’t a huge fan of but will go has a giant menu and dedicated grill/fryers for gluten menu.
I even found a pizza place in the city we were in last night that makes a gluten free pizza. I just might have to try it.
It’s not that Master and I eat out a lot, because we don’t, but when we do I’d like to be able to enjoy the day after with Master and not the nearest bathroom. Ya know?
Today, in just a few minutes Master’s other girl will be here for play and socializing. She wants to go to subspace this time which is something I tend to avoid. I don’t expect that it will be a fast play session and I’ll be out somewhere for awhile. Thankfully I have a ton of work to do!
I’m off, have a great weekend!
–lunaKM
This post is for the Submissive Guide Blog Hop. You can participate too!
7 Things You Have Learned From A Dominant About Submission
Can you think of 7 things you have learned about your submission or submission in general from a Dominant? Why is it important to look to Dominants for insights on ourselves? What makes learning from them different than learning from other submissives?
When I started learning about submission the people who I found first were Dominants. They wanted to talk about D/s or sex or things related to BDSM. Finding submissives to talk to was actually difficult. Listing seven things that I’ve learned from Dominants about my submission or submission in general might be easier if I think back to those first few cautious months.
Learning from Dominants about submission is valuable because they aren’t clouded with beliefs and opinions about their personal submission. They see what you may not be seeing because they are looking at you from the outside.
1. Complete submission is a rare thing. No one can be in complete service all the time. There are life issues and stress that cloud our judgement and can derail our submission. When we are on we are really on though so watch out!
2. Submission in the wrong hands can leave the submissive damaged and broken. I’ve seen this on only in my real life experiences but online as well. We are vulnerable as human beings and allowing someone so deeply into our lives and being mistreated can do tremendous damage.
3. The expectations of my service can change on any given day not just with different Dominants. Master can change his mind, he can demand more of me one day and less on another. It’s his whim I have to adjust to – not mine.
4. What I consider submission others may consider slavery and vise-versa. I’ve talked about how I don’t connect with the label ‘slave’ but that others consider me a slave. It’s that difference of opinion that makes us so wonderful and accepting of variations of submission.
5. I choose to submit every single day; it’s not a natural personality trait. That choice brings about so much joy in my life that it’s not even a question of if I will choose to submit that day but how.
6. Submissives have every ability to be leaders, mentors and persons of great respect. Dominants feel pride in their property. I am a leader in the community and hold great respect from those who know me. Master has admitted to feeling pride for his submissive because of that.
7. My submission is unique but I can still share my story, knowing that it has common threads with other submissives. I once thought that because there are so many submissives out there who would really want to hear my story. After 8 years of blogging I think I’ve proven to myself over and over again that people want to follow my life and progression in service.
This weekend was a good one. Friday I asked Master if we could play; it had been such a long time. I told him what I was seeking as far as goals for play and he happily accepted the challenge.
We used the new breast vice, I asked for marks and to use a blindfold during the session. I took a lot of delicious pain. It was one of the best play sessions we have ever had.
I’m still dropping a bit from it. Today I asked Master for a little pick me up spanking to help me recover a bit. It did help and I was very happy to be able to connect what I needed with what I was feeling.
Master and froggy are connecting even stronger. I feel a sense of pride in Master, knowing that he is helping another submissive correct her happiness and joy in serving. I feel a connection with froggy as well. It is good for us that she is in our lives.
Master helped me pick out a new purse yesterday. I’m quite happy with it. I’m more happy with the time with Master that I get when it’s not spontaneous just hanging around the house. We went out to lunch too and I think he would have gone to a movie too if there was one we wanted to see.
I have a lot to try and accomplish this week. A lot of writing and research and preparation. I also hope to get some housework done. I have the submissive forum on Wednesday and froggy is coming up this weekend.
–lunaKM
Wednesday was a busy day for us. We got up early and drove to Iowa City to see froggy. Master had a lot of new toys he wanted to try out that are things I can’t handle. It was also meant to be an intense play session for them. The drive is always the hardest part – it’s 2.5 hours each way.
While they were playing I was at Panera getting a lot of Submissive Guide and CIPEX work done. I’m pretty proud of all the work I accomplished actually. When Master called to ask if I wanted dinner, and why wouldn’t I, they came to pick me up and we went to a steakhouse.
The conversation was great the whole time. froggy asked me questions about how I feel about their relationship and what’s going on and I alleviated a lot of her fears I think. I’m really okay with it. The limits that I have asked Master to abide by are being respected and that makes me feel good about their relationship. I also know that Master considers me priority number one so if I had a problem he’d respect the relationship we have and not overstep boundaries.
He’s so wonderful about that. We both never considered that a poly sort of relationship would develop but while it has conditions to it, there is no doubt that Master has an intimate connection with froggy and I enjoy being around her.
Now, on to my diet change, which has been very positive. I’m not fighting it as hard as I thought I would and I know that cravings will get me but I will have to overcome them. My digestive system hasn’t been this quiet and normal in years and I’m so thankful for that. It’s been a full week of no wheat products. I have to keep going because now I have no choice – I know it’s making me feel better. The low carb diet has been adjusted to allow some other carbs like occasional potatoes and rice since pasta, bread and wheat gluten products are no longer an option.
Thankfully the explosion of gluten free living as a fad diet has provided a lot of foods that I can explore like brown rice pasta, gluten free baking mix for pancakes, waffles, cakes and more and so many other things. I don’t see them as being staples to my diet any more than bread was in my low carb diet but they will be nice treats.
I’m making Master banana bread today. He loves the stuff. I’m okay with it and now well, it’s just for him 
Things are going well on the sex front and we are planning to play tonight! There might even finally be some anal sex. I can’t wait!
Wheat and I, I mean. Master and I are going strong.
OMG I think Master and I both forgot that yesterday was blogging day. Wow.
I’m in day 5 with a wheat-free diet and my digestive issues are clearing up nicely. That’s a good thing in that I’m feeling better, but a bad thing that I must have some level of Celiac Disease (which my dad has). I’m probably going to have to stop with the low carb diet and eat a gluten-free diet instead. We’ll see how I do with what I’m doing so far.
In other news we were vacated from our apartment tonight for a fire down the hall. The whole hall was full of smoke, but the alarms didn’t go off. We stood in the parking lot for about 20 minutes, cats in their carriers in the car wondering how bad it was.
Thankfully we are back in our apartment just fine. I have a slight headache from the smoke but I’ll be okay.
Tomorrow we go visit froggy; Master’s other playmate. He’s looking forward to it and I know she is too. Should be fun for both of them. I’m going to be at a restaurant with wifi and doing some work while they play. I’m actually looking forward to that too. What I’m not looking forward to is the drive. Ick. Two hours each way.
The breast vise that I talked about in a previous post arrived yesterday and once it was assembled it was on my titties. I love it. Next time I hope we’ll try it with the spikes facing in (at least on the top, not sure of the bottom).
Off to play more Minecraft before bed.
–lunaKM
Alright, I have had to come to the conclusion that in order for Low Carb dieting to work for me, I need to consider the bad for me foods as allergy foods or poisons. I mean, people who are allergic to foods don’t just say, “oh well, I’ll live with the consequences” and then eat it anyway. Since I’m pretty certain that I have a gluten intolerance (I know there is a test for that.) I’m going to be happier and healthier without the bread and wheat products anyway. My father has Celiac Disease and has had it since he was 20. Bread and all wheat products are just off limits to him. The whole no gluten fad going on right now? Just means more foods for him to eat.
(This next part might be a bit too much information, just warning ya.)
Ever since my teenage years I’ve had serious issues with stomach and digestive problems. Frequent (3-5 times a day) and runny stools. I just put up with it as normal for the longest time. In my adult sexual life that has hindered a favorite play of mine – anal. Master and I have both noticed a huge improvement in my digestive health when I’m better at low carb dieting and avoiding the bread, pasta and other wheat related items.
So, this week I decided to make it work I’m just going to have to realize that bread is an allergy food, wheat products are an allergy food and not go near them. I can do this. I have to do this. If you look at the slutty stats in my sidebar Master and I have only had anal sex once this year. I want that number to be a lot higher. I love anal sex. I love big stuff in my ass. It’s just one of my kinks, and to not be able to do that drives us both crazy.
Today I have not had any wheat products. We’ll see how tomorrow goes.
–lunaKM
Master took me out for dinner and Coldstone tonight! He’s such a wonderful man and I adore when he treats me.
We also had money to burn so we got something off of our wish list – a SodaStream. Master drinks a lot of flavored sparkling water and we constantly have plastic bottles all over the place. This will save us money and recycling/waste from the bottles. Now we just have to find a flavor that he enjoys and we’ll be all set. Thankfully it comes with a sampler pack so we will have fun going through that.
He set it up as soon as we got home and made orange soda. It tastes just like Fanta. Yum! Such a great deal, it really is. Now I just have to find space in my already cramped kitchen for another counter appliance.
Tomorrow I go to UNI for a BDSM presentation. I’ve been doing these every semester for gosh, 8 years now. They are a great learning experience and the teacher always asks us back. Educating vanilla people about kink is a good feeling all around. Master is coming up with me but he won’t sit on the panel – he’s not into that. Thankfully I’ll have company for the drive!
Master ordered another toy for us to play with and I’m excited for it because it was something I suggested to him – a breast vice. But this is no ordinary breast vice, this one has teeth! I love having my breasts squished, squeezed and pressed that I think this will be a fantastic addition to the toybox.
Oh, I’ve looked into making a bondage frame as well and love the idea I’ve seen get some recommendation in the Riggers and Rope Sluts group on FetLife of using an A-Frame steel bracket that they use for wooden swing sets! It requires little in the way of construction that way. I’ll just have to get a drill to make the holes in the beams and then the hardware. I asked Master if he wouldn’t mind having a frame that would fit over the bed and he said get making it slut! Now he hasn’t approved the purchase but I am sure it’s just a matter of time.
–lunaKM
I never understood the hatred for Mondays. Even when I was working full time I seemed to enjoy Mondays. Today was good. I got up after a good night’s sleep, got some chatting with friends done and then chores before Master got up. When he got up we had lunch and sex. Oh the sex.
I’m starting to feel a bit better today. I’m not sure if it is because my period is coming or if the sex we’ve had recently has helped my mood. Amazing how that works. Of course, I do have the cramps coming to bring me down a bit, it’s a crappy thing, blech.
I’ve been thinking hard this weekend about figuring out how to be more personally accountable. Every week I see a post on Money-Saving Mom about the 10 goals she sets every week and how she progresses with them. I am just in awe of all the things she gets done with that simple list. I wonder if I would have the drive to do more than make the list. I mean, I think about the fact that I have chore lists for every single day of the week and I don’t think I get more than 80% done every day – with no excuse.
I’m also not doing well diet and exercise wise.
Master says I focus on the negative too much and don’t see the progress I’m making. But then, I know where I’d like to be and I know where I hold my standards. He has high standards and I guess for some things I keep it higher.
Thursday we go visit my Alma mater and give a BDSM Panel presentation to the sexuality class. I’ve been doing it for 7 years. it’s fun and the students seem to learn a whole lot. We always have excellent questions. I look forward to it every semester.
So, I’ll keep thinking about the plan for being more accountable and productive. We’ll see what I come up with.
–lunaKM
Another week is done here.
I’m depressed. I know I am. I can’t seem to get in touch with happy feelings and positive emotions. I’m finding myself crying at odd moments and when I can sleep my dreams are very vivid.
There are positive things going on in our life right now, I shouldn’t feel as I do – there is no reason for it. But it’s impacting my everyday life and the relaxed state of Master’s life as well. We have so much to look forward to in the coming months – so much going on.
Yet getting through a single day takes a lot of patience and trying to stay busy. I’m already on an anti-depressant. I just can’t pull myself out. Sure I could increase the dose, but what is that really doing but covering up. I need to work through it.
Master knows more about what is causing this depression than what I’m comfortable sharing here and he’s shown so much patience that I am in awe of him. I know things will work themselves out, but I don’t have patience. I want to be better now.
So I stay busy. It’s not really a productive busy either. Games, TV watching, surfing the internet. Just to keep my mind moving. Nothing more.
–lunaKM
After being sick for well over a week we finally had sex today. Now if only we can get the spark back that makes sex exciting we’ll be so much better.
I still can’t shake some of it and had to take a couple naps in the last few days. I’m not sure why I feel so tired right now. Hopefully it goes away and I can return to normal.
I don’t really have a whole lot of things going on right now to talk about, belief it or not.
–lunaKM
Tonight Master and I had our first orgasms since being sick a week ago. Before that I had hurt my back so it had been almost 2 weeks for me. I sure needed it. The resulting orgasm was like a warm shiver roll over me. It was a great calming feeling.
Once Master is well enough I know I want to seduce him for sex.
I got some cleaning done today after being sick you know that the house needs some catching up. I scrubbed the inside of the dishwasher because it was not cleaning dishes anymore. It’s a lot better now!
Tomorrow I work on cleaning the bathroom.
–lunaKM
LunaKM, I was wondering what Taken in Hand means and how it relates to the BDSM lifestyle?
I’m not really the best person to ask this question since I hardly understand it myself.
What I think I understand about it is it isn’t really a part of the BDSM lifestyle at all. It’s a male-led marriage that has to do with faith and obedience in that faith to your husband. Proponents of the Taken in Hand lifestyle try very hard to remain separate from BDSM. There is some discipline involved but it is more along the lines of a Domestic Discipline relationship.
That’s about all I really know or understand about it.
You might learn more from the website: Taken in Hand.