Baby Oh Baby

Well, Monday turned into hell. We had another breakdown argument and well things are doing better now. During the loud discussion as with all other discussions he asks me how he can help me change my behavior and attitude. Each and every time I tell him I don’t know. I say this because what I think would help is something he’s never been very agreeable to… punishment.

He’s great with reward, really really great. But punishing me has never been his thing. So last night I fessed up and told him I needed punishment. He agreed to help me by being harder on me and punishing me when I slip up, as soon as I slip up until I learn. It’s been painful but I think I’m learning.

I spent Tuesday feeling guilty and trying to be the perfect submissive. Master appreciated the efforts but will appreciate it if I continue past my usual 2 week mark where I tend to slip. Hopefully the immediate correction will help.

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Today my sister had her baby, a girl, and she’s been wanting a girl really badly so she’s on cloud nine. I visited her in the hospital today. The baby is beautiful. Yay! I love kids, other people’s kids.

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I have a blown blood vein in my eyeball. It’s left this red blotch in the white of my eye. Kinda creeps me out really. I’m not 100% sure how I got it, I’m thinking the hard sobbing and coughing during Monday’s first punishment session. I had a lot of atoning to do…

–luna

Possibly related posts:

1. Whirlwind
2. Kids
3. Reliving Childhood
4. Follow the Yellow Brick Road
5. Feeling Down