I don’t know if I’ve ever talked about children on this blog, or the reason why I don’t have any. It’s not a secret. I don’t want kids. I’ve never wanted kids. When I was 8 years old I gave my sister all of my baby dolls. When mom asked why I had done that I stated matter of factly, “I don’t want to be a mommy.” Now I don’t know how Mom took that. I don’t know if she thought it reflected on how she mothered me and it doesn’t matter. My opinion has never changed. Even when I married children were never a thought. I’ve always been clear with my boyfriends that children were never going to happen with me so they had better know for sure what they want.
It’s not that I don’t like kids. I love kids. I just do NOT want the responsibility of raising kids. I don’t want them around all the time. I may not know what I want all the time, but I do know that kids are definitely not a part of it.
I use the excuse a lot of times that other people ‘like the Duggars’ have already hit the quota for kids and I’m not going to add to world overpopulation. I say that I’m afraid that the abuse I suffered will be repeated and I’ll become an abuser (it’s a real fear I have). A kid crying grates on my nerves so bad and if they scream and raise havoc I want to go over and shake them sometimes. It’s bad.
I do not spend more than a few hours alone around kids. It’s for their safety and my sanity. I’m fine with other people around, for some reason it’s manageable.
I can’t write about what it’s like to have kids or be submissive while being a parent. Does this make me any less of a submissive or a person? No. I know where my limits are and I do not assume to know what it’s like to be a parent submissive. Anyone who has asked for my advice I clearly state that I am not a mother and don’t really know what to do for them. This doesn’t change my opinion that being a parent doesn’t make being a submissive any more difficult. It just makes it different. You do things differently. You think differently. You behave differently. How you handle being different CAN make it difficult, but again this is not the same thing.
If you have additional questions about my choice for no children in my life I’d be happy to answer them.