Weigh In: 351
I’ve gained 3 pounds since last week. I’m pissed, depressed and annoyed. We may have only done 2 days of exercise last week, but I watched what I ate pretty well and increased my water intake by 1 liter. I’ve never been above 350. I feel humiliated and unhealthy. My knees are screaming at me, I’m afraid my back will go out on me again (like it did when I was up this high before), I’m sure my blood pressure is really bad too. Stressing about it I’m sure just makes it all worse.
Master and I are going to try to exercise every day this week. We have a few different work outs planned. I hope I can make it though them and come out next Monday with a lower weigh in. I want to lose quite a bit of weight and the first step is to lose some so that I have motivation.
I bought healthier foods and didn’t buy the bad foods. We’ll have to see if that helps my food choices. Master is getting healthy too and I’m looking forward to doing it with him.
As far as my submission I’ve been horrible at my mood. I’ve been angry and snappy. Just horrible. I don’t see it ahead of time, I just blow and then get in trouble. Sure, it could be the weight, the physical stress of weighing so much. He’s asked me to find time to go over my cleaning routine so that he can start enforcing it. Sure, we can get to that. I’d like him to be more consistent in his focus on me, it’s been a bit staggered. Maybe I’m stressed with that as well.
I know I was quite bratty at the munch on Saturday. I was quite temperamental today and Master asked me what was wrong. It took me a bit to say just about everything. It wasn’t honest, but it was truthful. Perhaps that doesn’t make sense. Everything was bothering me, but he didn’t like that I wasn’t specific. I know that he let it slide today because as soon as I told him my weight… well… he took it as my big issue.
Sigh.
–luna
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I'm a large, curvy, lustful submissive learning the ropes in a full time D/s relationship. My explorations with love and life and BDSM have brought me closer to the edge of pain and pleasure, deep desires for rope bondage and debauchery but moreso a desire to delve deeper into submission and service to my Master 
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Luna,
The weight will come off, just be patient, I know this is hard for you, maybe you should only weigh in once every two weeks and think about this, you could be losing inches and toning up; with that you will not see the weight fall off………..
Keep your chin up, your Master is behind you and will always be there to help you win this battle. You are lucky, most don’t have anyone who really understands the pain behind being a bigger person, or the agony of trying to do everyday things, they take them for granted and just do it.
Life is a struggle and from reading your blog, I have more faith and hope to better myself, knowing someone like me is going through the same things. Hang in there, you are a beautiful sub……lucky to have a devoted Master, the rest will fall in place…..trust me : )
Tom’s Cunt …….smiles, diana
Master said the same thing, that I could have put on muscle because of the exercise we are doing. I just shook it off. I want to see the scale move in the right direction and I’m really impatient about it.
He’s great at keeping me realistic though. We’ll do it and he is wonderful so I know that with his help I can get it down.
Maybe you’ve already talked about this and I missed it, but is weight loss surgery an option at all? I can’t remember what you said about insurance since you’re not working. It’s just that so many people I am reading right now are having such success with the various weight loss surgeries they’ve had, I can’t help but think you’d benefit too if you could do it.
Otherwise, I’m gonna echo what the other comment said. Be patient, stay positive, keep trying.
kayas recent blog post..[Insert Title Here]
I may not have talked about it. Weight loss surgery is not being considered and never will be. Master has it set as a deal breaker and I’m not interested in it at all. I don’t have insurance and can’t get insurance until I get my BMI down under 40 (I’m at 48). I’m sure I’d benefit, but I know I can lose the weight. I’ve read and seen shows about people doing weight loss surgery and they almost all say that they can’t or won’t exercise and I watch them eat things that I wouldn’t even touch.
I’ve lost 40 lbs before not 3 years ago. I can do it again. I’ll keep trying.
Weight is the main thing on my mind the past month or so. I lost 50lbs a few years ago and then i had my hysterectomy and i’ve put most of the weight back on and to be honest i feel like it’s all my fault and i’m a failure.
I have got to get my fat ass off the couch and start exercising again.
And you are so lucky Miss Luna your Masters not bring you chocolate, chips and junk food like Sir’s doing to me. grrrrrrr
I’m going to sit down with Sir this weekend and talk to Him.
With all that being said………I just want you to know that no matter what the scales say about you i think you are the prettiest person inside and out i’ve met on the internet .
Big Hugs
His mija
I’m sure we can do this together. If you want to follow me on my weight loss efforts I have a whole new page here on the blog, it’s awesome
He can give you the sweets, but you are still the one to eat them
Make them gifts for people at work or send them to other family members as surprise gifts.