Master and I are off balance. Lately we’ve been doing our own thing, freely snapping at each other and not very welcoming to D/s or even vanilla sexual advances. It could be all related to holiday stress, or financial strain. Master and I have stayed at our own computers and not really interacting more than, “would you make some coffee, please?” It could be that we need a pick me up, a rejoining of our roles. I’m hoping that we can do that after the holiday is behind us. Perhaps for a renewed new year.
I snapped at Master in the car on our way home from the store tonight. He did his usual stance of being upset and reminding me that I don’t need to be so snappy. I basically said, “Well, what are you going to do about it?” Was that testing him? Why did I say that to begin with? I don’t really know. It could be related to the feeling I have of needing his dominance even when sexual or SM activities aren’t going on. I’ve not felt a lot of that lately. I need my submissive centering time and I’ve not taken it lately.
Master wants me to work on a set of resolutions for next year. I’ve been thinking of what I’d like in that list, but I don’t know what Master’s intentions are with this list. Does he want to enforce them? Will he want to see me really give it a go myself? I’d really like to know that so that I can make resolutions that are either worth the effort or with his enforcement. Doesn’t make sense? Well, who asked you! 
Yeah, well resolutions have never been very successful for me. If you take a look at my Goals page, you will see last years resolutions… none of which I have achieved. It worries me to know what to select this year. Do I just reuse last year’s? Do I make new ones? I have no clue.
I’m doing okay with a daily diary for my diet. If you’d like to follow I have the RSS feed linked in the right sidebar. My blog is called 100 to Lose. Come on over if you’d like. Sunday is as always, my weigh in day. I have 25 minutes of exercise yet to do tomorrow to meet my goal for this week. I can do this!
–luna
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I'm a large, curvy, lustful submissive learning the ropes in a full time D/s relationship. My explorations with love and life and BDSM have brought me closer to the edge of pain and pleasure, deep desires for rope bondage and debauchery but moreso a desire to delve deeper into submission and service to my Master 
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I’m sorry to hear of the friction between you and your Master. I hope that the post-holiday period will find you in a more relaxed and amenable frame of mind!
I know that Master and I have our tensions, but we work hard to overcome them. Of course, Master is very good at cutting through all the BS to get to the core of us. It’s one of the reasons I love him so much!