April 2005

You are currently browsing the monthly archive for April 2005.

DJ luna

Well, so Master wants me to write here. I really don’t have anything to say other than that I have been busy today, finished the hemp flogger that someone purchased, and cleaned out my car, made a roast. Fun fun ya know.

I was supposed to DJ today, but no one was around to switch me over to my control. So, it will be tomorrow. If you want to tune it, that would be great. I prefer new music, dance and house, alternative and the like but will play anything. The URL to put in the winamp window is http://eu02.egihosting.com:8074. Infinity RadioIt’s on all the time, with some great music and dj’s. They have a irc chat room at irc.bondage.com #Infinity-Radio . I have the 9-11am Central Standard time slot. Come take a listen. I have my winamp library listed at http://luna.kinkygroups.com/playlist.php.

So…. I’m not allowed chocolate or fast food til June 9th… sigh, guess I need to learn my lesson.

–luna

Sick Cat Worries

I have 2 cats. One medium black haired named Zeus and a black and grey tabby named Maximus. They are a great joy in my life. So when one of them is ill, it has a profound affect on my mental attitude. Maximus is in the hospital with a urinary blockage. It’s a common problem with male cats. I’m worried about him though. I’ve never been without them around, and to have one away from me for a few days is unnerving. He was my little shadow and I miss him underfoot. I can’t wait for him to come home so I can baby him to death and love him over and over again. I miss my little Max.

Tomorrow is my last day of classes for the semester. I have 2 final exams next week and then a summer ahead of me. I’m really nervous about having summer and no prospects of work. I want to have time to make floggers, and hopefully sell them. That is my dream, but I think it should remain a dream. Master has a few dream jobs I’d like to see come to light first. He seems really excited about doing them. I just wish he didn’t have to work so hard all the time. He admits that he can work harder, and sometimes, some days I wish he would.

I feel so out of energy lately. I need to exercise, I need to feel good about my life, but I’m so sapped of everything. I’m sure it has something to do with the stress we are both under and I wish I could fix it.

Tomorrow, it all begins tomorrow, the beginning of summer, the beginning of a work frenzy with flogger materials, a desire to make money. With just 2 exams to study for, I hope to get something going on my floggers. I’m having problem finding places to post my things for sale…

–luna

How did we meet?

How did you meet the person you serve?

I have had people all around asking me how I met Master. It’s a great story, and one I’d like to have written down somewhere anyhow, so why not now. It makes me smile just thinking of it.

I met Master in June of 2003 in an IRC chat room on irc.bondage.com called Anal-sluts & whores. It’s quite interesting how I ended up there to begin with. In short I was horny and wanted to play online with someone I knew. He agreed to have some fun. I was online collared to another man and got permission to go and play as long as I used a different name. I found this room, as it had open scening and was quite active. He and I had our fun and I decided I liked that room and would come back.

After a few more days, I found myself on that server again and chatted with the people there, and got to know them well. I spent my nights there and had some more fun with people, I find that my favorite thing is to flirt. I enjoyed teasing the people there and getting to know even more on a personal basis. One of these people I got to know was Master_Ben. He was a 19 year old Dominant, exploring BDSM and D/s online as it was his only outlet. He was “courting” a girl that I had some misgivings about, but was there for him to chat and we carried on conversations about just about anything. I enjoyed talking to him and we did some cam to cam play occasionally to basically shoot the breeze so to speak.

Time passed and friendships solidified, he collared the girl he was courting and I was honored to be the one officiating over the cyber ceremony. It was a nice ceremony, but my misgivings of this girl still never faded. I was there for Master_Ben during frustrations, aggrivations and annoyances, happy and sad times. During this time, I was released from my collar abruptly and I welcomed the freedom to explore real life and did so with both hands, but a blind eye to dangers.

I experimented real life with casual partners, and shared these experiences with my friend, Master_Ben. I was drawn to him, but thought that he wouldn’t be the type of Dom I wanted mainly because I was a masochist and he was a sensual Dom, or so he wanted to believe. Through my discussions he learned he had a desire to see what Sadism was like.

Now in the early months of 2004, his collared girl disappeared, literally. She just stopped coming online and ended communications with him. He was crushed, and I was there to help him stay strong. My heart was hurt for him and I was there at every available time to help him. We grew close rather quickly. In the end of April he presented me with an idea.

He admitted that he was drawn to me more than I thought and I finally admitted my curiosity in him. Officially at the end of April we were an item. We spent 6 months really getting to know one another, playing, thinking, exploring and planning. He was coming over to the US and needed Visa, Money and a Plane ticket. I was so excited to finally have someone that needed me and I needed him.

He changed his name to KnyghtMare and mine was luna. I committed myself to him and planned my new life around his arrival. He arrived at 5:30pm on October 7th, 2004. My life had been fullfilled. This diary started in December as a part of my commitment to improving my submission and understanding the things that go on with my thoughts. It also helps him see my moods and thoughts concerning my changes and life with him.

That’s how we met. Perhaps some day, Master will sit down and share his side of things.

–luna

Pet Names

From Kindlings: What pet names does your owner have for you and do you respond differently to different forms of address?

Master has a variety of pet names for me. They help me distinguish his mood on most occasions. On the same hand, I have a few lovely names for Master as well. I do have to say my favorite is Master, but it isn’t always appropriate. Learning when a nick name is appropriate is still a challenge for me.

Master’s pet names for me in order of my favorites are:

  1. Slut – He uses this when we are being so nasty and hyper sexual. It drives me wild to know that I am his little slut and it will put me in a mindset on most occasions to do just about anything to satisfy his desires.
  2. Baby – When he calls me baby he’s in a very cuddly mood and I love it when he is affectionate. He blows kisses to me alot and licks his lips provocatively when he’s in this mood. He knows that when he calls me baby I will smile, and it never fails. ;)
  3. His girl – This one has to be the one that makes my knees week. It is so possessive and strong. He calls me his girl when he wants to remind me of his control over me. He also uses this term most often when he is around other Dominants.
  4. Jennifer – This name, my real name (take note), gets used when he is upset with me, I’m being naughty, or he needs to drive home a point. I actually cringe when he resorts to this instead of calling me hon, love, sweetie, baby or any other name.

My names for Master are limited. Master is most common, but I call him baby, hon, and sexy on occasion. John is for around other people, but I try hard to make it sound sincere and loving, just as my other names for him. Master fits, Master works and I love calling him that.

–luna

An apology

Well, so if you’ve noticed my recent posts have been short, whiny and not too interesting to read. For that I apologize. My life truely has been interesting, and I should be happy to share it with my blog readers, and especially my Master… whom has been quite disappointed in my recent bout of phrases and whinny interludes. I’m sorry Master. I shall do my best to care about what I write here.

Lately has been a bit hectic as I have the end of the semester to contend with. Those of you that are students yourself can understand the stress I am currently under. I have a presentation this afternoon that I feel completely unready for, even though it has been put off for a month previous to this because of a death in the family of the partner I am doing it with. Wish me luck, for all that will do me. I have reviewed my part sufficiently, now if I can make sure I stay in the language I’m supposed to (Spanish) I will do fine. I am working on a paper too that I find trying, only because the two books I have to use are not set up at all the same, and it is a chore to find anything supportive for my analysis. Why do teachers pick these kind of books?

I have been interested in becoming a Passion Party Consultant www.passionparties.com, as you might have read previously and the contact has been trying to catch me. I have been busy and avoiding the phone so I shot off an email to her to make sure she knew I was still interested. I don’t know if I can afford the start up package at this time, but soon I think I can. I am positive that I would do well selling sensual products geared towards women. Anyone have any thoughts on what you think about it?

I really enjoy doing the D/s forums every month for the local munch group. I hope that I can keep doing it as long as interest holds out. I learn so much and I feel that others in the group sure benefit from it also. Next month’s topic is subdrop. I am having a hard time setting up my knowledge base on it so that I don’t sound like a complete dolt when the time arrives, as my experience with it is lacking. The essays online are either incomplete or hard to use. If anyone has any good advice, experiences they want to share or essays online that I can look at, please feel free to email me at prplefaeriedust@yahoo.com. It would be a great help.

I am finally beginning to see why Master likes to have things done that way or this way, and feel better about serving him when he wants it. It makes him happy and I feel great knowing that he is pleased with me. I’ll have to see if there are things I can do on my own that will in turn please him. Perhaps a weekly full-body moisturizing, or always having my nails painted or something along those lines. He does enjoy when I take care of myself as it reflects him.

This Sunday is a CROP members meeting. I’m not sure what all we are going to talk about, but I am prepared to do my part and contribute what I can. I need to fill out my membership form yet, but I am considered a paid member as I am on a commitee. Yay! Master is considered on a committee too since he is the webmaster of the site, but he is kinda hesitant about the “position” I think it’s cause it’s volunteer work, and he isn’t in the mood for free labor. I can understand that.

I made another flogger sale this week. I will be making the order this weekend hopefully. I am waiting on the materials. I think it will turn out great. I hope the customer likes it. It will be made out of heavy hemp twine and will have knots in about half of the fall. I think it might need to be weighted a bit, perhaps braiding the twine so that the Dominant won’t have to use so much wrist force to swing it. I am also thinking of a nice handle, maybe a leather weave so it looks nice. We shall see what I get into when I actually get the materials.

I hope this catches you up on all the things going on in my life.

–luna

I hate shaving

I really hate shaving. It takes me forever because Master insists that I shave everything below my neck, and yes, that’s a lot of ground to cover. Dang it. Sometime its such a waste of time, whine whine whine….

–luna

Subspace

Today’s forum was subspace and it went great. We all talked and shared a lot of things with each other. I know I learned a lot. I feel more secure in my life, my choice of submission. I learned that there are different facets of subspace and that everyone experiences it differently. I also learned that my periods of relaxed feeling is a part of subspace. Well heck, I get that almost every single time. So, happy me.

My friend az was there and I could tell that the meeting was getting to her, mainly because this is her last event. I’m going to miss her so much. I hope we can keep in touch when she moves.

–luna

CROP site up

So, today I helped Master get the CROP website up and functioning http://www.crop-ia.com . I’m pretty excited to have this done and well… I can help do other things now. I have an outline for my paper done, going to start writing it tomorrow morning, and I have most of my presentation prepared for Thursday’s presentation in Spanish class.

Tomorrow night is April’s Forum. We are going to be talking about subspace. It’s been awhile since I have been there myself, so I am going to try to participate all I can. Master has gotten me pretty close, on the edge, to that good warm soft giggly place. I feel like a little child there, and the silliest things make me laugh and I giggle like crazy. I do know that is not the deepest I can go though. I have been where everything that happens is in slow motion, sounds are muted and my reaction to pain is so low that I beg for more with my eyes. I know it is caused by endorphins in the brain, but I think that connection to your partner is also important. It can take you there even faster when you have no fear in the world that he will push you beyond your capabilities in space.

Mindset is something completely different and I feel that you can feel “spacey” in the subm mindset but they are not the same thing. I feel a submissive mindset only occasionally, usually when I’ve been cleaning a lot and I am “in that mode.” I enjoy the mindset though and want to find other times when I am in this mood.

I notice I don’t even think when Master requests more coffee, I am up on my feet before I finish whatever I’m in the middle of to please him. I like that a lot and hope that I can do it more in the future. I want to have that no thought reflex more often. I’m sure it will come to me slowly, just as everything else.

I have to get back on the bedtime routine, I felt more at peace with my day when I did it. I was so happy to find it and start it 2 weeks ago, I want to go back to that. That is my next little goal. Get that routine going.

If you haven’t looked at the bottom of the page recently, you will see I have updated my ticker. I have lost 5 lbs since restarting my diet, however I do believe most of that was water weight. I’ll take whatever I can get though. We’ll see if I can keep that up next week.

–luna

« Older entries