March Question Month
Here are the rules ask any question and I will blog my answer. You can ask anonymously. Just ask your question(s) here in comments or via email. I am not tracking ip and have it set so it will accept anonymous comments.

I would prefer personal questions, as I do have an Ask lunaKM column on Tumblr for the more general BDSM/submission or situation-specific questions.

Do you have a question for me?

You tweeted about your Master KM having a girlfriend? Is she his submissive like FroggyKM? How do you feel about sharing him with yet another woman? Will she eventually be collared to him too?

Yes he has a girlfriend. She’s a friend of ours that lives 2 hours away. She’s a Dominant but wants to explore submissive stuff with KnyghtMare. So she’s not like froggyKM at all. She has her own likes and dislikes and her own life. She’s poly too and has a husband and a boyfriend.

Sharing is hard but as long as I get the reassurance that I’m priority (which he never fails at doing) I’m fine with it. 

How is living Gluten – Free going in your new city? Have you been able to try any new restaurants and cafes? How is your food budget going with your living Gluten – Free?

It’s hard. I’ve found one restaurant so far that I like, but we are now getting tired of so I have to try and find another one that I like. I’m sure they are out there but not as easy for me to find this time around. The food budget is going alright. I’m staying in budget for grocery shopping so I guess that’s a win.

Have you gotten used to your new city? Do you like it? What if any activities have you found in your new city that were not available in your old city? How do you like your new apartment? Done any cool decorating yet? Have you found some new Munch Groups that you enjoy?

Well, used to it, sure. Like it? Not really. But I knew that going in. It’s just not my type of town. KnyghtMare and I aren’t really a go out sort of couple so if there are things to do here we’ve not looked for them. I love the apartment. It’s spacious and I’m looking forward to using the balcony this Spring/Summer. No decorating yet, but I might share it as I can.

The munch group in the area is one that I was a member of when I lived in the area an hour north 12 years ago. While the population has changed, the group is still here. It’s something I’m trying very hard to get to know and I still host my submissive forum every month for this area. It will grow eventually.

–lunaKM

I got a few more questions for question month so I thought I’d get them answered for you. And if you have more questions, this is the month I answer just about anything!

Are you religious? If so how do you intertwine that with your submission?

No I’m not religious. I was in my childhood leading all the way to college. Then I started really studying science and began realizing I didn’t need faith in my life. I know people who do intertwine their religion with their submission and it works for them.

Have you and KM talked about kids?

We covered the children talk before we got together. I needed to find someone who did not want children. I’ve never wanted children. Even as a little girl I gave all my baby dolls to my sister and never looked back. I told my mom back then that I was not interested in being a mom. KM does not want children either and later this year will be getting a vasectomy. At least that’s in his plans. He keeps telling me to make the appointment already but I want to wait until after our Anniversary in June.

Would you ever want to work out of the house again?

Yes and no. We’ve talked about me getting a job again, but the added cost of travel, food and loss of work on Kink Network related stuff would make it not feasible. KM makes enough for us to live on and I can serve him this way a lot better than I would at a job.

Does KM give you spending money for yourself for things you enjoy such as books or movies or does he make all the financial decisions?

He makes all the financial decisions but I’m a spoiled lady. I ask him if I can have something I’d like, like books, movies, makeup, whatever and he rarely says no. Sometimes he’ll say maybe later but honestly he’s pretty open to spending money on me.  Just last week I got new bras and a new blouse to wear for a con we are going to in May.

 

Thanks for the questions!

–lunaKM

My question(s) is how do you as a woman and your personal views on feminism relate to your choice to serve and enter into this lifestyle? Do you have moments where you think “Should I be doing this”? because of the way our culture is set up now in the 21st century?

Thank You,

TheBlackQueen

Hi there,

I don’t have any issues at all with submitting and feminism. There’s a point in time where a woman learns that they should be actively getting what they want in life and that being feminist is really all about making sure you are happy with what you have as a woman. I’m not about to argue with a guy who might make more money or have a higher standing than an equally successful woman.  Men and women are different. I don’t want to be compared to men. And I’m not going to actively push to make all women equal to men because let’s face it, people in general are not all equal.

Submission and feminism can co-exist. Being submissive is the most powerful thing I can do. I choose to submit and to be vulnerable to my partner. It gives me everything I’ve ever wanted in life. I’ve never thought that I shouldn’t be doing this, that some how society is in control of my life. I’ve been my own person for a long time now and society doesn’t govern how I live.

Thanks for the question.

–lunaKM

 

Hi lunaKM, I hope this is more what you are looking for as far as questions for March Question Month and not coming off as a personal question as it is not intended to be. I have a question regarding serving your Master. I noticed in some tweets you refer to him as DH and I was wondering what that meant? I am new to the lifestyle and have just only begun to serve on a regular basis. I find there are some days I just don’t want to do it or really have anything to do with Him. Do you go through the same thing/feelings? Is this common for you and other submissives as well? How do you get past those feelings? Will those feelings ever completely go away? Cheers, bluebliss

 

DH stands for Dear Husband and usually those tweets have more to do with his husband role and my affection with our marriage than a D/s one.

As for feeling like you don’t want to do anything with your partner some days, sure it happens. Moods come and go. You learn to adapt and to submit because of the reason you wish. To get past it, I personally have a mantra (It’s in the sidebar with my bio) that helps remind me that I chose to be submissive no matter what, even when I’m not feeling it. You are new so it’s likely you are still learning and growing into who you wish to be but it will be less frequent as you experience life as a submissive.

–lunaKM

Law and Order

The people downstairs must be addicted to Law and Order. All I hear all day, everyday is the droning slow chords of the “suspense” music that you hear in most all cop dramas. It’s annoying. And I can time my day by the “doink doink” every hour. Ugh.

–lunaKM

I’ve had a couple questions for updates on the Master’s poly and how I’m managing it so I’m going to lump those two questions together.

Master and froggyKM are doing well. They have their ups and downs as any couple might but they are still happy with each other. He goes over there for a massage every Tuesday afternoon and Saturdays are froggyKM’s day. He’s there from lunchtime (about when he gets up) until her bedtime. She’s welcome to visit any other time as long as she asks first but she’s not really taken the liberty to do so.

I feel a lot better about this since I do have my space and she has hers. There’s something about knowing that no one else is getting fucked in the same places that I do with Master that is oddly comforting. This is my sacred fuck place, I told Master once. No one else gets fucked in this house. I have this terrible plague of envisioning him doing other things on this sofa or that bed or here or there with others when I know it’s happened and it turns me off to wanting to do the same. So, having this place full of just me and him sex memories is very comforting in a way. Am I odd? Sure. But that’s they way it has to be.

My relationship with froggyKM feels artificially strained. I think since I was so adamant that no hanky panky happens over here and that she needs to ask to come over (and has only done so once since we moved here) that she’s stayed away. Of course it would be nice to see her more often when she’s ready to do that. I miss playing games and hanging out.

Now, as one of you keen people has noticed, Master has another person listed on his FetLife profile now. Ms Kiva is a good friend of ours and identifies as a Dominant but over time has expressed wanting to explore some ideas of submission and play with Master. So, the relationship he has with her is a play and sex partner, confidant and friend. They plan to see each other once a month (she lives 2 hours away). She is poly as well and has other relationships that provide other things for her since Master is so far away. This is still a very new thing and they’ve only seen each other a couple times without me around so far, even though we’ve been friends for several years.

She understands the boundaries I have on the relationship and their relationship will do just fine with them in place. I know she thinks it’s a bit odd that when she comes here to visit that they can’t do any sex or play here and that they have to get a hotel room. But I also know she’ll adjust just fine.

I think I covered all of the questions on Master’s relationships and my comfort level, but if you feel I left anything out, or you have new questions, let me know.

–lunaKM

T.O.M. asks: Ok so here is what I want to know who does the lovely graphics of you that have and do adorn this site?

The graphics aren’t actually of me, but they sure do look similar don’t they! The artist is Les Toil and you can find a gallery of his work at ToilGirls.com

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